GOTCHA!

This post is somewhat delayed, as my internet situation has been spotty.

But now I finally have internet! And there is so much to tell. 

I wrote this on Thursday, January 12, 2012...

The best news is we picked up Ryan today and he is with us!!

 

To back it up, Somehow Sergei never got the message that I was not

coming on the tenth. Our judge had asked him to bring some documents

from Karkev that he needed on the tenth, so Sergei had been here for a 

day-plus when I arrived. He had begged the judge for the court decree

w/o my signature, got documents from the orphanage, gone to the vital

records office to start things started and reserved the same apartment 

we'd had the last time we were here.

 

He met us at the train at 6:45am with Kyle Stefanowitz and Pastor John, 

who has a church and ministry here. We were on the same train as the 

hosted kids and said hello to Anatoly, one of Ryan's' classmates, Vera, 

Masha and the others, drank some coffee and hot chocolate from a little 

machine (yum-o) and chatted for a few minutes. Then we drove with 

Sergei to Visalivka to the vital records office for Ryan's new birth certificate. 

It only took about 20 minutes instead of the often 2-3 hours since he'd been 

there yesterday. The girls slept in the car (slept all night on the train! Had 

great temperature, they loved it!!) as we drove to Vilnyansk, and while Sergei 

got Ryan's tax identification number, then picked up the McAndrew's court 

decree.

 

So we were at the school at 11am to get Ryan. Today! A whole day earlier 

than I had planned! We had to pick up the inspector so we could all sign our 

names for his release. When we got to the school the director wasn't there. 

So since we had to leave by 1pm for a 2pm passport application appointment, 

I got out my suitcase of gifts and separated things. The kids helped me parcel 

things out to the various intended recipients. We gave a pile to Nataliya for 

Irina, to Valentina for kids at the school (socks, mittens, a few toys, coat and 

gloves). Ryan gave gifts to his teachers and caregivers that I'd brought for them 

and had so much fun doing it.    

 

We found Nadia and gave the pollypockets to her, found Sergei, Oleg, Anatoly

 and gave them matchbox cars, barbies to give to the girls, and a few balls.

 I wish I'd had more time to be with them. I have grown to love them all! 

They missed Adam and wanted to talk. They were so thankful and understood

 to share. Sergei said, "Kristina, me America, you, please?" I said, "You'd like

 to go to America?" "Yes, please." Tear jerker and heart squeezer! He is a 

sweet boy with a mom that I saw visit once while here so I don't think he wil

l have the opportunity to visit America. I gave a football to Arthur, one of the

tough older boys. I've been working on connecting with him while we've 

been here. He softened up so much, saying thank you and offering to carry my 

bag. God bless him.

 

And then guess who was there to spend the day since her brother was leaving 

tomorrow? OKSANA! So we took pictures, chatted (kinda) then she went to see 

friends while we did our thing. She was happy to see us and so happy for Ryan. 

We went back to the office and the director was available to sign our release 

documents. Then we all signed our names, as well and Sergei took the inspector 

back to her office. We waited while the doctor was working on getting the 

medical documents. Then it was 1:10 and time to high-tail it to Zap for the 

passport. 

As we loaded into the car, Sergei said, "Oh, and by the way, Oksana and her 

friend,Lilia are riding with us so she can see where our apartment is so she 

can see you while you are here." Yay! And the doctor needed a ride to town. 

So Sergei and the doctor were in the front and in back, Emma on Oksana's lap 

(two peas in a pod now, loving eachother!), Lilia (Oksana's school mate), me, 

Bethany and Ryan. Yes, we took pics! They were all laughing hysterically. 

After we dropped off the doctor I moved to the front. Then out came the ipad 

and photoshop and crazy giggles. Good times. :)

 

Sergei was heavy-footing it to Zap, took a short cut, got lost, called to say 

we'd be late, used his gps to get us back on track and we got there at 2:15.

It took about 30 minutes to wait, take Ryan's picture, sign documents for 

approval of the name/dob and pay an additional new fee that has just been

instated.

 

Then we drove past our apartment so Oksana could see it, drove to her dorm

and took a tour, then took her to the grocery where we dropped her off. I 

have her phone and address and she is planning on seeing us, but we did not 

make a set plan. We will be here for a week so hopefully we can connect.

 

We had eaten nothing all day and I was surprised that the girls were fine...so 

we went to McDonalds for "CHEESEburgers". We all chowed down then unpacked

at the apartment, went thru Ryan's suitcase and started laundry. He had 

everything we'd sent back with him still folded in a suitcase! At least those 

clothes don't smell so bad but the rest are in the laundry; I'm on load three! 

He is a trip. So happy and he and the girls are soo funny, sweet, cooperative 

together. They all three spent the evening in relative calm. I gave Ryan a 

drawingpad & pencils and he drew for a while, copying the pic of oranges 

on a juice box. He's quite good. Emma colored, took pics of the other two,

her drawing, the NewYear's tree in the square.

 

Then Bethany played on the touch and Ryan played a math game on the ipad. 

They were sitting together on the green leather chair, each doing their thing 

with him periodically asking her a question. Sergei has two computers and is

letting me use his big laptop since he only uses it for drawing translation for 

the big screen. Too bad I gave my modem to Rachael!

 

All 3 kids ate granola bars and fruit snacks, brushed teeth and are in bed - have

been for 30 minutes. Ryan said he was tired and the girls obviously are. He has

his watch alarm set for 9am. We prayed together before bed and I tucked Ryan 

in on the couch, Bethany in on the green leather chair laying sideways and 

Emma in the bed with me. 

 

On another interesting note, Rachael will need to apply for Nick's passport from 

theoffice here in Zap. The vital records office in Bernyansk is slow so they only 

got court decree and birth certificate today. The will go to tax ID office in the

moning there then drive to Zap forpassport application and STAY here in Zap 

while waiting. How fun that will be!

 

Sergei thinks if the electronic record update got done today by the tax ID 

office lady,who said she would do it today, then we could have Ryan's passport

Monday, Tuesdayif it gets updated tomorrow. Fast. :) It was great to have so 

much done already before I got here.

 

So, whirlwind of a day and I am so tired. The girls traveled great, both loving 

the trainride so much. Bethany slept up top and loved it. They are so glad to be 

here and it was so precious when Ryan came into the school building lobby and 

saw us all. He gave me a massive hug then hugged Bethany, twirling her around

then picked Emma up in a hug and twirled her around. Wish I had pictures of

that!   

Kris

A Big Day

At 11:30am on December 27, 2011 at the courthouse in Vil'nyan'sk, Ukraine we officially became the parents of Vyacheslav Nikolayishyn aka Ryan James Proctor!


Our court hearing was set for 10 o'clock so we were up in time to swing by Don and Rhonda McAndrew's apartment and pick them up. The plan was for Sergei to drop us off at the courthouse then drive to the orphanage, drop the McAndrews off to visit with Yulia, pick up Slavik and come back to the courthouse.


Don and Rhonda had been told for the two previous days that their court approval was likely to be signed by the Deputy Minister of Social Policy but for some reason it did not happen. With the new ministry, the SDA director and Deputy Minister need to sign off on things and although they have five days to do it, it is not happening consistently. 


So on the off chance that they did get court approval during the day, they prepared. They packed all of their luggage and loaded it into the car. They dressed for court. We would already be in Vil'nyan'sk so if Sergei got word of court approval and the judge would be willing to accept a fax copy of the approval (extremely rare, highly unlikely) and hold court (he was) they would be prepared to attend the hearing and then zip to an in-country plane to Kiev to catch their originally scheduled flight home.


Because of the time when we arrived in Vil'nyan'sk, it was decided that we'd all go to the orphanage, get Slavik & Valentina and head over to court. We arrived at the orphanage at 9:30am. Sergei went to get Valentina and I went to find Slavik. I went to the room where we usually visit and it was locked. I tried two others and they were locked. I asked four different kids who all disappeared to search and returned shrugging their shoulders. By now it was 9:40! I asked one of the ladies in the office and she sent someone somewhere and he appeared. 


I told him, "Get your court clothes on we have to be there at 10 o'clock!" He ran to get the key and we rushed upstairs where I pulled the clothes from his closet and began pulling them off the hanger. He did not seem to sense my urgency!


"Hurry!" I urged.


"Okay, Mom," he said, as he slowly began taking off his shoes. Seriously, child! Move it! I pointed to the time on his watch again and said, "Court 10 minutes!" and then he got it. He changed, went to return the key and then we ran over to the school with James and Adam and found Valentina on the phone and Sergei in the attorney's office. We waited. And waited. Then I said, "Should we go?"


The four Proctors squeezed into the back seat, Valentina in the front and Sergei driving. We pulled out of the school gate at 9:55am for the ten minute drive. Sergei stepped on it, literally. At one point he hit 140 km/hr (87mph).


We were outside our courtroom at 10 o'clock. Sergei informed the judge and then returned to say that the prosecutor was running late. So we caught our breath and looked around the courtroom while we waited.  About 10:20 everyone was in place and the judge and two jurors entered and took their seats.


There were preliminaries stating for the record all present and the reason for the hearing. The judge was professional yet humorous, asking me my name, date of birth, address and sign. As in astrological sign. I had no clue what he was talking about and it took me few seconds to catch on. "Oh, ah, Cancer." Turns out, he's a Cancer, too!


The judge asked us questions then opened it up to the jurors, orphanage representative, orphan caregiver committee head (local inspector) and prosecutor. It was nice to have a comfortable feeling during the process, set by the judge's humor and the pleasantness of the others. They asked about how we knew Slavik, about employment, finances, what our children thought about the idea of adoption, if we understood the responsibilities of parenting. He also asked Adam some questions about his relationship with Slavik--Did he like him? What could Adam tell him about Slavik? What did they like to do together?


Then Valentina made her official speech as Slavik's representative. She was very passionate with the bottom line being she felt it in his best interest to be adopted by us. We observed over our weeks here that Slavik has a deep affection for her and she for him. Next the inspector reported all of the known history of Slavik's life, the prosecutor stated she felt it was in his best interest to be adopted and the judge and jurors left to discuss and make their decision.


A few minutes later the inspector and prosecutor put their coats on and said goodbye. I would have expected them to stay for the announcement of the decision but I guessed that meant it was a yes. And it was.


The judge and jurors returned and the judge asked us again what we were requesting (adoption, new birth certificate). Then he read a very long, official conclusion granting our request and said, "Congratulations."


We took some pictures and then returned to the orphanage. We hung out with Slavik, a few of his friends and the McAndrews and Yulia for the afternoon, waiting on word for court approval for Don and Rhonda. Sergei went to the post office to sit by a fax machine so he could get the fax immediately when the call came. The time came when the judge went home and court was no longer an option so we decided to head home.


We stood at the car reminding Slavik that I would be back January 9th and giving hugs. Wow, that was hard! Awful. Terrible. Slavik was being so brave and trying not to cry but tears were inevitable for all of us. He stood next to the car and watched us turn around then stood in the drive watching the car until he couldn't see it anymore. Quite a roller coaster of emotions for one day but we are now that much closer to the day when our whole family will be together!

 Court Clerk, Slavik, Kris, Judge,

 Orphanage Deputy Director - Valentina- Adam, James

Kris, Valentina, Slavik

 The court room

 A very happy boy!

All smiles. 

Heading out after the court hearing. 

In front of the courthouse.

Kris

PS--The McAndrews got court approval later that evening and will have their hearing tomorrow! :) We are so blessed to have shared this time and experience with them.

REUNITED!

Monday morning we were up bright and early. Or should I say, dark and early. Sergei, our in region facilitator, said we needed to leave the apartment by 8:15 in order to reach the inspector's office in Vil'nyans'k by 9am. There wasn't really a worry about waking up in time, since neither James nor I were able to sleep much. James just doesn't sleep well if he's not in his own bed but for me it was because I was soooo nervous! I wasn't really nervous about the process but about seeing Slavik again. It seemed silly to be so nervous and I kept telling myself to just accept that I was nervous, not judge it and go to sleep... but that didn't work. 

Sergei working on our piles of documents.

The drive took about 45 minutes. The streets of Zaporozhe were busy and the driving here is very different than in the US. It initially appears somewhat random and thus is a little hair-raising! I had no idea there were 800,000 people in this city! Sergei is a great driver and well prepared for being on the road for extended periods of time. He has a radar detector, a meter to measure distance driven (he is our 'taxi'), a digital camera that records out the front of the car in 5 minute segments (in case the police stop him and manufacture a violation in hopes of receiving a bribe, he can prove his innocence), chargers for his laptop and 2 cell phones.

One of the roles Sergei fills is as our awesome driver.

The city streets are full of people walking, stray dogs, massive concrete apartment buildings, tiny mini-mart type kiosks, trash. There are lots of shops, some with names in English like Second Hand, Coffee Is Life, Curves, Adidas and Levis. There seem to be quite a few notaries, pharmacies and little markets but maybe it just seems that way since I can read those words in Russian!

New Year's Tree in the main city square, just outside our apartment.

View down Lenin Avenue

Lenin Avenue

Curves!

A nice apartment building.

The drive takes you out of the city, which stops without transition. Fields with tall, dead sunflower stalks in them or plowed under corn and wheat fields with very black, rich soil on either side are the only view, aside from a few groupings of homes and a couple of lonely looking bus stops. There do not appear to be any interstates but once you leave the city limits of Zap there are only a few other vehicles on the road until you reach Vil'nyans'k.

Our arrival at the inspector's office was timed well and we were expected. After introductions, she looked through our documents and began working on her letter of permission. After a few minutes, she and Sergei started paging through our dossier and comparing it to the SDA's letter of permission. She found that there were two errors--the spelling of the orphanage and my middle name. Thankfully she said that she would go ahead and begin the process as long as Sergei would have Nastya get a corrected document from the SDA in Kiev.

According to Sergei, in his experience (60-plus adoptions facilitated since 2000) most inspectors would not do this, as the SDA's letter is a legal document and the person listed (me with my name misspelled) is not the person in the dossier (me!). That mistake alone could have cost us several days and in this at-least-3-week-long process, every day is golden!


Soon the regional letter of permission was completed and the deputy inspector, Paulina, was ready to accompany us to the orphanage to 'observe our interaction' with Slavik. We all piled into Sergei's car and were off to the orphanage to see our boy!


It was only about a 5 minute drive outside of town. As we pulled up to the orphanage, I didn't even realize where we were! It seemed to me that it looked like most of the other buildings we were seeing--big, grey, cement. Then I recognized the ping-pong table area from pictures I had seen. We drove through the gate, past what we later learned is the 'dorm' and parked right next to the front door of the school.

With Slavik in front of the school building.

We were ushered through a large lobby into the deputy director's office where we were introduced to her and the director. We were told the director was leaving because he is "very busy" so we shook his hand and said "hello" as he was moving out the door. The deputy director, Valentina, would take care of things. 

School lobby area with entry door, back left.

Valentina was very excited to meet us. She nearly jumped up from her chair to greet us. She told us she knew the family who'd hosted Slavik previously, that they had been to Vil'nyans'k to visit and they had recommended us as a good family for Slavik. She told us she recognized us and our girls, Emma and Bethany, from Slavik's picture album. I was impressed with the amount of English that she was able to use to communicate with us.


There were ladies scurrying all around us. We were urged to sit down and someone brought in another chair. And then all of a sudden...he was there in front of us!!

Me with my two boys!

He hesitated just inside the doorway for a brief moment and then made a beeline to me with a huge smile on his face.


"Hi, Mom," he said and squeezed me really tight.


He gave James and Adam hugs then came back over to stand next to me. He leaned into me and put his head on my shoulder, a huge grin on his face all the while. Then he asked, through Sergei, why it took so long for us to get there.


"Papers, papers, papers!" James said, miming a pile getting larger and larger.


"Ah," he said, nodding his head. He knew that but just had to ask! I am sure the past four months seemed endless to him. I know they were long for me!


"Slavik, do you know these people?" Paulina asked with a laugh.


"Oh yeah," he said, grinning from ear to ear.


A few minutes later, Paulina asked Sergei to drive her back to the office. We spent some time sharing a photo album from home with Slavik and Valentina while Nataliya, the orphanage attorney, began preparing paperwork. 

Sharing our photo album with Valentina

A while later, Slavik was called into Nataliya's office and when he returned he said he had written his letter stating he wanted to be adopted! 


Ahhh! I wanted to be there for that!! :(


The rest of the day we spent working or waiting on documents needed from the school, having our letter of intention to adopt composed and notarized, and getting Slavik's passport picture taken. 


We walked around the school grounds taking pictures and asking questions, meeting kids, and then ended up inside with some of Slavik's classmates playing Dutch Blitz. When Sergei called to say it was time to leave, it was about 3:30pm. 

Statue in front of the school.

None of the kids seem to know who it is.

I think it is a teacher and student.

Walking toward the living quarters

Side of the dorm

 Very proud of his strength!

He does many pull ups and push ups daily.

The PE teacher, a woman, is very inspiring to Slavik and his friends, 
as she can do more push-ups and pull-ups than they can count.

Dad doing pull-ups, too!

Girls bedroom where all Slavik's class has their closets
and where we usually hang out.

This tag identifies Slavik's bed...

Nikolayishyn Vyacheslav

Dutch Blitz with Slavik, Kolya, Sergei

Dutch Blitz with Kolya, Nadia, Oleg, Sergei, Anatoli

Slavik walked with us down to the car and we had Sergei translate letting him know again, what the overall process entails and that he will not be going back with us when we leave in a few weeks but that he will go home in January. I wanted to make sure he was clear on that piece, as we had not discussed it at all prior to our arrival and the last family that adopted from here a few months ago completed their process in one trip. After the explanation he shrugged his shoulders and said, "Okay."


We gave him hugs and got into the car. He followed the car all the way out the drive, knocking on the windows, saying "Bye" in English and waving. I was worried he was going to get his toes run over but he was not conscious of that risk at all. He just wanted to maximize the connection he had to us. The last time I turned around he was standing near the entrance gate with his hands in his pockets watching the car head down the road.


One long day. 
One step into his world. 
One link added to join our world and his.


Kris

Traveling to Zap

Sunday we traveled from Kiev to Zaporozhzhe on the train. We left the apartment around 12:15 and made it to the station with plenty of time. Once our train was posted on the board, we made our way to the assigned track. Because the escalator was broken, we had to pull our suitcases up several flights of stairs...no easy feat! 

                       Loading up Nataliya's car

The Kiev train station

                                  Just inside the lobby

                                    The train schedules

                                   Waiting for the train

                         The ceiling in the train station

 Once at the track, Nataliya spoke with the conductor to let her know where we were going and she agreed to let us know which stop was ours. 

I have to say it is very different to completely be depending on others to get where you need to be! What it the conductor forgot? We could end up in who knows where? We did know the train would get to Zap at 11:07 pm and I figured out the train schedule on wall in the hall outside our compartment, which helped ease my tension a bit.

Boarding the train was another strength building exercise! The first step was about 2 feet up and the space was very narrow. James stepped up first and then Adam and I 'handed' our suitcases up to him. There was hardly any room to move and once Adam and I stepped up and in, it was like sardines in a can. I couldn't help but giggle!

We waddled ourselves down the car to our compartment and got settled. Nataliya showed us where the bathroom was and we were all set for the adventure.

                                     Our compartment

                          James in our compartment

                                       Adam up top

                       Hot tea and sugar. Delicious!

                                     I love this tea cup!

Sugar snatcher

We found the compartment to be clean and there was enough room for all three of us and our luggage with some to spare. It was very nice to have lots of leg room, compared to the plane where we had hardly any room to move. It was fun to watch the scenery change from city to country and to watch people out the window at the various stops.

I did get nervous as the train was pulling in to the station in Zap about how we would find Sergei, our in region facilitator. It was dark and we were to disembark next to the station, not in it. We knew he would be looking for us but it was soooo dark! And it seems that nearly everyone wears dark clothing. And it was late at night and not well lit. And I was tired.

As the train came to a stop, I saw a man running alongside our train car. It turned out to be Sergei! I was so relieved. I asked him later how he knew where to find us and he said he asked the conductor where the Americans were! Guess that would do it!

We drove to our apartment with only a stop at a seemingly random corner kiosk (8x8 foot mini-mart) on the way to get the key. Once inside the apartment building, we loaded Sergei and our luggage into the lift and the three of us began the ascent to apartment 80, which turned out to be 120 stairs up on the 7th floor! 

We got settled about midnight and hoped for some sleep before we had to get up early and get to the inspector's office to start our process.

I think we slept about an hour total. The mattress has no foam on one side of it and the twin blanket is a little challenging for two to stay under, even when snuggled up. 

Honestly, I was so excited and nervous about seeing Slavik that I probably couldn't have slept even if I were in a luxury hotel. 

I will post about the best stuff, our reunion, soon!

Kris

Exploring Kiev

  
So, the plan was to get up with the daylight at 7 or 8am and spend the day checking out more of Kiev.


I woke up thinking I'd had a good long sleep but when I got up to look at the clock on the cell phone it said 12:30am. And then I noticed Adam was sitting up playing on the iPad and James was awake, too. I got out the Benadryl for the boys and the Ambien for me and an hour or so later we were back to sleep.

Deep sleep... and then it was close to 11am when we all got up. Burning daylight! 

Our breakfast stash of yogurt, corn flakes and milk, bananas, grapefruit and kasha (oatmeal) with dried fruit is convenient and yummy. We have been eating twice a day, once in the room and then out once. There is a little market a block away where we can get the basics, including some yummy chocolate!

                                 Outside our apartment building.

Our destination today was St. Andrew's Street or Andriyivsky Spusk, as the Russian-speaking majority calls it. The street is named after the Apostle Andrew, who is believed to have climbed the hill here, affixed a cross to its summit and prophesied that this would be the site of a great Christian city. 

St. Andrew's Church, at the top of the steep street, is considered to be a magnificent interpretation of the traditional Ukrainian five-domed, cross-shaped church. It was built in 1754 by Italian architect Bartolomeo Rastrelli, who also designed the Winter Palace in St. Petersburg. It is currently undergoing reconstruction, as the hill it is built on has moved and caused damage to it's foundation.

The a cobblestone street seems to have seen better days, as it is very bumpy. 

                    A view of the street with St. Andrew's directly ahead. The gate
                        on the right is the entrance to the SDA office.

It is lined with purveyors of Ukrainian crafts, Soviet memorabilia, beautiful paintings, and many matryoshky (stacking) dolls in overflowing souvenir stalls. It is quaint and has nice character. We noticed a few foreign shoppers in addition to ourselves but most were locals.

               

All types of Matryoshky dolls--

The traditionals as well as

Princess Diana, Barak Obama, Osama Bin Laden,

Notre Dame, Green Bay Packers and Chicago Cubs

There were blocks of paintings for sale. Most of them were individually covered to protect them from the elements. Today was very rainy.

We also saw St. Michael's gold domed monastery, named after Kiev's patron saint.

 We ate lunch at Celantano's Pizza right across from St. Andrew's church. The Greek salads were delicious. The cheese pizza had a crust similar to a tortilla shell. 

Yes, there was wifi!

They were playing Owl City over their speakers, too.

It has been nice to have some down time. Tomorrow we will take the 1pm train to Zaporozhye, which will get in around 11pm. Our translator, Sergey, will meet us and get us set up for the night. Monday morning we will begin our process in region and hopefully get to see Slavik!

Kris